Hello fellow bloggers and fellow friends. I am starting this blog to keep track and record of progress being made with the restoration of my house, my body, my family, and my relationship with Yhwh. The past few years have been less than easy. I have watched the foundation of my life erode away. With the death of my mothers parents, the death of my brother, the brutal divorce of my parents, the worry of losing the house I have lived in for over 12 years, and the constant struggle to find a reliable vehicle to get me to and from my job, life has surly taken its toll on me. Now a young adult, I am struggling to find out who I am, where I am going, and how on earth I am going to get there. I want to live a life that is an example to those around me. I have seen and experienced the rock bottom of finances, emotions, and faith. Only by the grace of God and great friends am I even here today. I want to stand tall saying “I made it through all of this, and you can too!”

House: After being on the emotional roller coaster from hell, the appearance and upkeep of the house was the least of my worries. Things would be scattered about and tossed here and tossed there. When I would come home from work I did not want to put the extra effort into cleaning the house. I was emotionally and physically rung out. Company would come over and everything would be shoved into a box and then shoved behind closed doors. After a while the boxes of assorted stuff started to add up. Projects I had once started, such as painting my bedroom and remodeling the bathroom, were put on hold. Now I have box upon box to unpack and sort through as well as the painting and remodeling.

Body: Being the stress and bored eater that I am, I have found my jean sizes ever increasing. This is not good. I am young. I want to look and feel my age. Worrying about how things are going to fit or if I can play that game of frisbee with my friends without becoming too winded are things a girl of my ages should not doing. I am going to be focusing on getting in shape so I can enjoy my life and my friends.

Family: I do not talk to my father or my sister at this time in my life. I feel abandoned and betrayed by them. I do not know if and when I will ever be able to restore my relationships with them. I hope someday I will be able to. My mother has been my strength, my rock, my best friend, and my roommate. There have been times that all we have had was eachother. With the stress of everything we have faced we sometime find ourselves attacking eachother. This is something I do not want to do. I want our relationship to be a constant friendship. I have been trying to walk away from frustrating situations and tell her that I love her as mush as I can. I would like to find someone to share this journey with but it is not on the top of my priorities. I would rather wait and find the one I can share my eternity with.

Yhwh: Oh he has been so good to us. He has been our provider and our strong tower. It is wonderful to know that I can call on him in my times of need. My prayer life has been a lot weaker than I would like it to be. I want that strong relationship with him that I once had. I want to know his word through and through. When people look at me I want them to see His glory shining through. Something I have started, is reading the New Testament 5 chapters at a time. It is a good balance for me, enough to keep my interest and enough not to overload me. After I have finished the New Testament I will read through the old and then all over again.

Thank you for letting me share this new project of mine with you. Matti